New Year’s Resolutions After Losing a Loved One

Written by: Rachel Martinez, Victim Services Coordinator

While many people start off the new year with resolutions to lose weight, exercise more, or spend less money, these resolutions might seem unimportant or daunting to those stepping into the new year without a loved one. Others might want to create a resolution in coping with their grief. Whatever is right for you, remember to be gentle with yourself and know there is no timeframe for when you “should” be done grieving.

Here are some ideas for new year’s resolutions following the death of a loved one.

  • Be honest about how you feel to yourself and others.
  • Get 20 minutes of fresh air or physical exercise a day.
  • Start a project that memorializes your loved one. (Example: Create a memory book, memory box, or even memory board on Pinterest to remember your loved one).
  • Start journaling on a regular basis.
  • Stop saying “I’m fine” when it isn’t true.
  • Attend a support group or spend time with people who make you feel well supported.

Whether or not you chose to make a resolution, take every day, every hour, ever moment, one step at a time in a way that works best for you and your grief process.

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Testimonials

"With the help of VSS, you are empowered and encouraged to fight back and be pro-active. Then your conscience can be more at peace because you know you have taken some action to protest crimes inflicted on your loved one. It is sometimes your only consolation."

“The one takeaway for me in working with VSS is that it is a necessary organization. I know they are funded by grants and fundraisers but it’s something we need to make sure as a community that they have the funding needed because what they do for people in need doesn’t happen anywhere else. This is the only place that this happens and VSS helps with so many things.”

David Rose

Anchor, Q13 News and Host, Washington’s Most Wanted

“VSS is there when the unthinkable happens.  When a police officer knocks on your door and gives you tragic news, VSS helps navigate the court system, which can be very confusing. VSS is compassion, caring, and commitment. Commitment to once justice is done that victims and their families can move forward with their lives.”

Jennifer Gregerson

Mayor, City of Mukilteo

“VSS has been our partner in recovery and healing and a key part in what makes Mukilteo Strong. VSS has been a trusted advocate for the victims that have suffered so much in the community.  I’m so grateful to VSS as our partner in strength.”

Jon Nehring

Mayor, City of Marysville

“VSS is there for people in their darkest hour. At a time when they need an advocate and friend, VSS steps in to fill that gap and help them begin their journey back to some sense of normalcy.” 

Myrle Carner

Crime Stoppers of Puget Sound

“This thing about closure. There is never really closure in a victim’s life but VSS helps individuals to get closer to that and that’s critical because the cops and the judicial system just move on to another case because they don’t have time. Victims live with this trauma forever so VSS is with them for as long as they need the services. VSS takes the time, more importantly, they really care."

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