Celebrating Valentine’s Day After the Loss of a Loved One

Written by: Jennifer Slobom, Victim Services Coordinator

The month of February brings with it declarations of love and plenty of heart decorations, chocolates, and flowers showcased in every store. Valentine’s Day marks not only a time to spend with romantic partners, but also a time to celebrate the love between family members and friends. Against the backdrop of these celebrations, February can be especially difficult if you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one. Rather than a time of celebration, it can be a time of grief, knowing that you can’t be with someone you love.

Though no one-size-fits-all path to healing exists, there are many therapeutic activities to help you along the way. During this time, it’s important to have a support system, to lean on others, and to remember to incorporate self-care into your daily activities. Focus on yourself and what makes you happy and healthy. What’s something that you haven’t done in a while that once brought you joy? Perhaps there is a hobby you’ve always wanted to pick up?  Painting, reading, hiking, volunteering, driving to a new place, and yoga are some great examples. These can be things you do with others or even by yourself. While it’s important to be around others and have a support system in place, heavy social interaction can also become draining when you’re dealing with grief. It’s okay to set aside time to be alone. Do whatever you need to do to help you in your journey to healing.

If you need someone to talk to, advocates are available on the 24-hour Washington State Crime Victim Service Center hotline at 1-888-288-9221.

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Testimonials

"With the help of VSS, you are empowered and encouraged to fight back and be pro-active. Then your conscience can be more at peace because you know you have taken some action to protest crimes inflicted on your loved one. It is sometimes your only consolation."

“The one takeaway for me in working with VSS is that it is a necessary organization. I know they are funded by grants and fundraisers but it’s something we need to make sure as a community that they have the funding needed because what they do for people in need doesn’t happen anywhere else. This is the only place that this happens and VSS helps with so many things.”

David Rose

Anchor, Q13 News and Host, Washington’s Most Wanted

“VSS is there when the unthinkable happens.  When a police officer knocks on your door and gives you tragic news, VSS helps navigate the court system, which can be very confusing. VSS is compassion, caring, and commitment. Commitment to once justice is done that victims and their families can move forward with their lives.”

Jennifer Gregerson

Mayor, City of Mukilteo

“VSS has been our partner in recovery and healing and a key part in what makes Mukilteo Strong. VSS has been a trusted advocate for the victims that have suffered so much in the community.  I’m so grateful to VSS as our partner in strength.”

Jon Nehring

Mayor, City of Marysville

“VSS is there for people in their darkest hour. At a time when they need an advocate and friend, VSS steps in to fill that gap and help them begin their journey back to some sense of normalcy.” 

Myrle Carner

Crime Stoppers of Puget Sound

“This thing about closure. There is never really closure in a victim’s life but VSS helps individuals to get closer to that and that’s critical because the cops and the judicial system just move on to another case because they don’t have time. Victims live with this trauma forever so VSS is with them for as long as they need the services. VSS takes the time, more importantly, they really care."

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